Texts From Last Night

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  (256): View more from Alabama

  My hair reeks of homosexuality.

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  (256): My hair reeks of homosexuality. http://tfl.nu/3s1n
  Replies (17) Good night (1168) Bad night (935)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I know she was great

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  (215): mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day (267): I know she was great http://tfl.nu/ms90
  Replies (26) Good night (7045) Bad night (1572)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold

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  (256): made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold http://tfl.nu/0w5z
  Replies (81) Good night (5348) Bad night (1715)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?

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  (989): is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off? http://tfl.nu/j7cy
  Replies (15) Good night (4800) Bad night (1188)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.

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  (804): I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday. http://tfl.nu/6jwi
  Replies (4) Good night (2789) Bad night (969)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.

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  (740): As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there. http://tfl.nu/knxy
  Replies (11) Good night (3530) Bad night (793)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him

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  (319): Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him http://tfl.nu/qb96
  Replies (16) Good night (2366) Bad night (740)
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  (949): View more from California

  So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?

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  (949): So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam? http://tfl.nu/9cgv
  Replies (18) Good night (3028) Bad night (1224)
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  (408): View more from California

  I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.

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  (408): I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night. http://tfl.nu/u07w
  Replies (7) Good night (1502) Bad night (738)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here

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  (219): Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here http://tfl.nu/huzw
  Replies (3) Good night (629) Bad night (716)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.

  (1+61): View more from

  Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?

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  (+61): You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek. (1+61): Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before? http://tfl.nu/tcy4
  Replies (11) Good night (2041) Bad night (398)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".

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  (360): You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes". http://tfl.nu/hqd9
  Replies (2) Good night (467) Bad night (572)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else

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  (954): I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else http://tfl.nu/v2q6
  Replies (4) Good night (1173) Bad night (344)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in

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  (312): I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in http://tfl.nu/almk
  Replies (7) Good night (607) Bad night (399)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit

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  (530): If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit http://tfl.nu/7bhz
  Replies (1) Good night (241) Bad night (185)

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