just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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