i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
We need to rekindle our bromance
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Two words: nipple clamps
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