my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
