idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
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Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
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I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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