Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You may now shotgun with the bride
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize