I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Randomize
