it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize