Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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