Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog