You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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