who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
porn star boner night. come get it.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Randomize
