So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
