Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
