Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
