was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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