I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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