I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
