i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
