Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
