Sponge bath it is.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
