Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
