As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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