Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick