Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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