Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Randomize
