im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.