thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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