in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
