just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
