eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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