Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
