But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
