Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
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There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
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Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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