You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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