he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
everyone is single if you try hard enough
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
