i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
