Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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