I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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