one might say we're banned from that church
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize