so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
