I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
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I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
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I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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