i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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