He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
