imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
