Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
