"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
