Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
