Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Come see our sink grown plant.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
