something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
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as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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