i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
