Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
